For whatever it’s worth, a quick note to let you know I’ll be taking a break from writing for the rest of the month. I’ll be holding my daughter tighter, breathing in the smell of her hair and skin, tucking her in with extra blankets until she is cocooned in her bed, crying myself to sleep another few nights until I can find a way to reconcile that I can do nothing to guarantee her safety.
I’ve never felt so vulnerable. I want to stop obsessing, but I feel like I would be abandoning those grieving parents if I move on. Those precious children deserve more than my Facebook rants, my tears, my fear. But for now all I can do is hold my little girl as close and as often as possible. Kiss her. Kiss her again and again and again. On her warm cheeks. On her nose. On her forehead. Turn off the lights, tune out the noise around me, and turn to God for peace and strength.
I’ll be praying the same for you. And for the aching families.